Craigs List!

Okay people, if you haven't used Craig's List you must start now. I was the classic sceptic. "Does this really save time and money? Is it really worth it?".
Answer: Yes!!

I bought the girls used Christmas presents on Craig's list (Dora House and accessories, Tool Bench, Polly Pockets, Baby Dolls) and then Chris insisted on buying some traditional store bought items to even out the purchases. So far the used items are the favorite! We should have only bought the Craig's List items! Next year only Craig's list purchases and fewer gifts. Hold me accountable people... With a hubby who loves to buy I'll need some extra man-power.

Side note: What the heck is the deal with Polly Pockets!? They're cute and G loves them but the storage and organization issue is a disaster! Little shoes, coats, hair accessories... I'm losing my mind and it's only been 2 days. Any suggestions for small toy organization?

Hope Christmas was wonderful for you all and that you aren't having Polly Pocket remorse...

Debbie Downer...

Do you remember that skit from Saturday Night Live titled "Debbie Downer" where friends were out together and there was one lady who would put a damper on the evening with downer details about life. After she made her comment the camera would zoom into her frowning face and the music would go, "Wah, wah, wah..."

That's how I feel right now. Chris' mom, Sharon, passed this last Sunday morning. We were expecting to lose her but it still feels sudden. We're surviving though...

My thoughts have been filled with such heavy content lately I could go on forever but one thought continues to swirl around my head. Am I ready? If God called me to heaven today would I be ready? Have I been honest and forgiving with my family and friends; to the point that I could leave them in peace? Am I focusing too much on the minor things (dishes, waist measurements, my husband's stupid comments) and forgetting about the majors (my blessed life, my health, my loving and committed husband)? Let me challenge you: Take a tally of your blessings and determine to meditate on the things that really add to your life. The things that take away are just inevitable little bits of life that we should acknowledge and deal with but not major on.

Random thoughts...

It's been a little while since I've blogged... It feels like I'm balancing my thoughts as they swirl around like they're in orbit. I'm thinking so much that I can't seem to put things together in my head, let alone on paper! Stick with me as I sort things out in what I'm sure will be quite random...

We've got a lot going: Chris' mom going to hospice, my brother's struggling, my sister has a new baby, financial struggles... The list goes on and on...

The amazing thing is that Chris and I are doing better than we have in such a long time. Marriage is tough and we are so constantly working towards our greatest marriage that sometimes we forget to just cling to one-another and appreciate each other. We're doing that now and just coasting for a while. It feels nice.

Little story:
Completely out of the blue, Georgia said to me today, "Grandma's going to die soon." Not a question; no emotion; just matter of fact; point blank. It was odd! I asked her carefully, "Who told you that?" She said, "I figured it out all by myself." Talk about perceptive AND talk about peace! Georgia loves her BaBaBoo (Grandma) and knows what happens when you die. (We had lengthy conversations about this when my sister's beloved cat died. In our house, for simplicity sake, cats do go to heaven!) She understands that we won't see her again but she's happy for BaBaBoo because she's going to heaven. Georgia gets that heaven is better than here and she's willing to let BaBaBoo go for that. Isn't that amazing! The things we learn from children. It blows me away every day.

Hope your day is filled with wondrous surprises and perspective.

Esther...

I was reading today in the book of Esther and was really convicted by how Esther conducted herself. I've read Chuck Swindoll's book, "Esther" and even after all that time spent on such a little book God revealed another thing to me just by reading his word. Amazing!

Anyway, enough la la... I was convicted by how Esther conducted herself when petitioning King Xerxes. Remember, by approaching the king without being summoned she was risking death but she did it anyway to save her people, the Jews. The awe inspiring thing to me is that she got his attention without being killed, invited him to dinner to discuss and when the King asked what was up she postponed for another day. She must not have felt like the timing was right. She was following God's leading and waiting on the Lord. I'm sure she wanted to ask and get the heck out of there! If it were me I'd be asking for what I needed right then and there and plunge forward into saving my people. Why waste time right? Wrong. She talked to the King the next day and the timing was perfect. Everything that happened from that point forward was synchronized with certain important events. I could see God ordering each day as I read on into Esther. Isn't that awesome!

I anticipate everything and I'm praying that the Lord will help me be more sensitive to His leading. I would suggest flipping through Esther yourself. (It's only 10 short chapters.) God's name is not mentioned in the book but you can clearly see His presence.

Hope I'm not too preachy-preachy...Here ends the sermon for the day!!

Aint no man like Daddy...

This morning Georgia and I were sitting at the kitchen table for breakfast and she announced, "We're going to play in my room this morning. What game do you want to play, Mommy? Clock or Tea Pot?". Agreeable for curiosity sake I said, "OK, I'll play. How about Tea Pot?". So I followed her downstairs (she wouldn't let me step one foot in front of her) and sat on her bedroom floor. She pulled out the blocks and said, "OK, make a tea pot." I thought, "Holy heck! I'm no architect. All these blocks are square and all the tea pots I've ever seen are round." I sat, dumbfounded but then made an attempt at looking confident and began my building endeavor. Immediately, Georgia informed me that I was not doing it right and I should try again. I tried again. Wrong again. Again. Wrong... Georgia stood up bewildered and said, "I'll get daddy. He knows how to do stuff like this!". She marched upstairs and Chris came down and put the friggin' thing together in under 5 seconds AND it looked like a tea pot!!!! Georgia looked at me and said, "See Mommy, Daddy will teach you how."
After I got over my lack of tea pot building know-how, I felt so thankful that I have a husband that will stop his sprint out to the door to get to work and build a tea pot for Georgia. I also felt very thankful that Georgia didn't call me a stupid-head. That certainly would have hurt my feelings.

Things that make you go ouch...

Call me a masochist but I like to feel things in all their painful glory. I never shy away from pain in order to really experience life. When my grandpa was on his death bed I didn't busy myself with other things but cleared my schedule as much as possible and shared some of the most precious moments with him. Precious but painful. I have story after story like that in my life. It's not conscious and I don't realize I'm doing it again until I come out the other side pain ridden but thankful that I had the opportunity to draw in and soak in the experience and the opportunity for growth.

Tonight as I type I realize I'm doing it again. Drawing near to the ones I love as they experience pain and their pain becomes my pain. Break-ups, cancer, marital troubles, and other things. At the end of a long day my heart aches and my gut feels heavy. I'm close to tears. Even in this moment I wouldn't change my day; my conversations; my aches; my pains; my life. I feel blessed to trudge through life with those that I hold so dear to my aching heart.

Excellence or Perfection?

Living a life of excellence is harder than we as women would like to admit. Or is it? Are we striving for excellence or perfection? I was given an excerpt from a book that really made me think and I'd like to share it with my people. Here's to all the excellent women in my life!

"The Better Way" from Finding a Mentor, Being a Mentor

Excellence is willing to be wrong,

Perfection is being right.

Excellence is risk,

Perfection is fear.

Excellence is powerful,

Perfection is anger and frustration.

Excellence is spontaneous,

Perfection is control.

Excellence is giving,

Perfection is taking.

Excellence is confidence,

Perfection is doubt.

Excellence is flowing,

Perfection is pressure.

Excellence is journey,

Perfection is destination.

The mess of success...

Chris and I have been working on goal setting for the last year or so. We've had many conversations dreaming about our potential life and how lovely it would be to have a little house in Europe, another on a beach and another in the mountains... Matching Hummers (that's Chris!), matching track suits (that's me when I'm slap happy), and for me to have two boobs that match in size and don't droop down to my toes (that's Dr. 90210)!! BUT, this is all a dream. A dream that isn't necessarily realistic to really create the life that we really want; the life that's best for us.

So, after much non-sense we've come down to this one question: How do we define success?

Often, we measure our lives against our upbringing, pop-culture or even, our laziness and tendency to just make it from one day to another. My whole being is desperately fighting against this mentality. I'm tired of just putting one foot in front of the other; I want to drive towards something. Not money, not fame but a life that stands out; a life that digs deep; a life that changes people (including myself); a life that brings meaning to all the difficult times. I want to succeed according to my terms; God's terms.